In 2011, Stephen Broden, a member of a Dallas-based pro-life organization, Life Always, put up an anti-abortion billboard. The billboard stated, “that the most dangerous place for an African American is in the womb.” The effect of the billboard was monumental. 

Marsha Jones, co-founder and executive director of the Afiya Center, responded to Broden’s statement with a billboard of her own. Establishing the hashtag #trustblackwomen, Jones unapologetically declared that “Black women take care of their families by taking care of themselves. Abortion is Self-Care.” Jone’s billboard received more pushback than Broden’s billboard. The message was strong, but was it worth the pushback it received? What feelings did the message spark within Black women? Author, playwright, and news reporter Natalie Moore too had these questions, many of which served as the origin story for her play, “The Billboard.” The play features a fictional women’s clinic in Chicago and their fight with a local individual running for City Council that puts up an affronting billboard that spurs the clinic to fight back. Both the plot of the play and the real events served as the base of her talk. 

I, as a privileged White woman, was unaware of the controversy between Broden and Jones. Yes, I was young when this all went down, but the lasting implications do not apply to me. Because I am not a Black woman, I was not impacted by the events that occurred. I feel like this connects to the discussions we have been having in class recently regarding feminist movements. In “There is No Hierarchy of Oppressions,” author Audre Lorde writes, “There is no hierarchy of oppression. I cannot afford the luxury of fighting one form of oppression only. I cannot afford to believe that freedom from intolerance is the right of only one particular group.” The feminist movement is one of the groups Lorde calls out; the feminist movement has long been a White women’s movement. I am privileged to be included in the feminist movement. Yet, this very inclusion also contributes to my ignorance. Personally, Natalie Moore’s talk served as a self-reminder that I need to continue to educate myself, continue to acknowledge my privilege, and continue to fight for all people experiencing oppression. 

Hale Robinson

September 29, 2022

My initial reaction to the no product day challenge was that it was a unique opportunity for me to determine how my confidence, peer interactions, and mindset would change if I was to avoid using everyday products for a whole day. I am someone who typically likes to partake in challenges like these where I can truly understand the effects through my own personal experiences.

I understand that this challenge would be slightly easier for myself than others as I am not someone who typically wears makeup, hair products, or other similar items. I do, however, use deodorant on a regular basis, sometimes reapplying multiple times per day. Additionally, while it is not explicitly stated in the challenge instructions, I decided against wearing a hat.

I wear deodorant because often times I am in a rush to class from morning workouts and a rush to dinner following afternoon workouts. As a result, my showers in the morning are very short and I feel that deodorant provides an extra layer of “protection” against my post workout odors. I often have the fear of people around me smelling my sweat following workouts and for the purpose of making other people and myself feel more comfortable, I often use a lot of deodorant. While many people would not consider a hat to be a product or item, I find myself often using a hat as a substitute for hair products. Rather than using hats to block the sun or as a fashion item, I often wear hats on bad hair days or days where I am feeling less confident in myself.

In the end, I was able to ultimately complete the challenge. I felt slightly uncomfortable as although I feel I did not smell that bad, in the back of my mind I wondered if other people could smell my post workout odor. Furthermore, I found myself to constantly be adjusting my hair, especially when I knew people were looking at me as I lacked the confidence that wearing a hat provided me with.

The hardest thing to go without was deodorant. I have gotten in such a habit of applying deodorant when I wake up and after I work out that I found myself almost reaching for it on several occasions. I am someone who keeps deodorant in my bag in case of emergencies so having to go without it for a whole day was slightly uncomfortable for me. The easiest product to go without was makeup as I have never worn makeup nor felt the need to ever in my life.

Even before my morning workouts, I often apply deodorant to prevent my teammates from smelling me during the lifts. When I returned from the morning workout, I was thinking about how I would dress lightly as to prevent my body from getting too hot and hopefully prevent sweating.  Also, I did not tell anyone I was doing the challenge (outside of the class) and found that nobody noticed or approached me. This was not too surprising to me as most people tend to be polite. Prior to going into class, I did not have many expectations as I do not typically wear makeup and I doubt anyone picked up on the fact that I normally wear a hat.

What I learned from this challenge is how dependent I am on a product that really does not change the way people view me as a person. Nobody seemed to notice the fact that I was not wearing deodorant, nor did they care that I was not wearing a hat. In the future, I will be wearing less deodorant and will feel more confident in the appearance of my hair in the mornings.

I think that this is a really cool idea for a challenge. I think I was a little hesitant to participate at first, but wanted to push myself. I don’t normally put on a lot of makeup, just a little blush in the morning and sometimes highlighter. I think that blush helps add a little life to my face and helps me look more awake, and the highlighter helps when I feel like my skin looks dull. I do use deodorant everyday and will feel uncomfortable if I forget to put it on, so that is what I was the most nervous about going into the challenge. I don’t worry as much about smelling a certain way, but I don’t enjoy the feeling of sweat. I did not use any of these products today because I wanted to commit to the challenge. I did not partake in any physical activity during the day. I do think that if I was planning on going to the gym or had a shift at work I would have broken the challenge and put on deodorant. This was the hardest thing to go without. The easiest thing to go without was makeup, because I recognise that it doesn’t make a huge difference to others, it mostly just helps me with my own self-image. While my routine doesn’t take up a lot of time in the morning, I did notice that I was able to get out of the door faster. As I expected, no one really noticed that I was going without products, and I didn’t anticipate people in class having a reaction. I was a little worried that people might think I seemed a little pale or tired, but that was not the case. I even mentioned it to some of my friends, and they said they couldn’t notice. Overall, this was an interesting challenge, and I wonder what the challenge would be like if I regularly used a lot of enhancement products. I have learned that people are usually just thinking about themselves, are not noticing what you look like, and we will always be our own worst critics. 

A few weeks ago, I attended the Drag Show performance that was put on by Rusk and Q&A. It was so much fun! I have always wanted to go to a drag show and it was truly a special night. The performers were incredible, and I was especially impressed by the student performers. I was struck by how unapologetically themselves they were– each person had their own unique persona, and each performance was different. Some embodied very stereotypically feminine looks– blonde hair, high heels, makeup. Others wore outfits that concealed more. Some of the performers merely wanted us to have fun and enjoy their dancing, while others had deeper messages about race and inequality. My favorite performance was done by three Davidson students. I just thought it was so amazing to see the talent that we have at our school and the way that they were able to get the crowd so lively and excited. Everyone was having fun, and I loved seeing the ways that gender was fluidly expressed. In class, we have talked about gender norms and the problems with the gender binary. These performers expressed gender how they wanted to, in ways that worked for them. I wish that our whole class had attended because it was great. Gender is a social construct, and these performers proved that. Gender can be labeled if you want it to be, but gender can also change and be expressed in so many ways. I am a cisgender woman, so my gender has remained constant throughout my life. However, sometimes my expression changes. The show reminded me that there are so many ways to express gender and love the way that I present myself to the world. I would like to attend more events like this in the future. 

Last week, when I was doing my final exams and spending time with my friends, I decided to do the No Product Day. I had done it earlier in the year when it was first proposed, but I will admit that I still put concealer under my eye-bags. This time, I wanted to commit. Because I am typically not a very active person and I shower every day, I was not too concerned about not wearing deodorant. However, I have a minimal but pretty regular makeup routine that I cling to, which includes light coverage to even out my skin tone, concealer on blemishes, and a bit of blush. Without it, I tend to think that I look sick or tired. However, I know that is just the internalized social norms. Throughout the day, I realized that it wasn’t a big deal if I wore makeup or not. My friends and my boyfriend didn’t notice or at least didn’t say anything. In fact, I was able to save time in my morning routine and I didn’t find myself adjusting my makeup throughout the day. I felt like I was giving my skin a bit of a rest. I definitely learned that it is not necessary to cover my face or use beauty products in order to feel like myself. This is an especially pertinent lesson because, as I am writing this, I currently have no makeup because the airline lost one of my suitcases when I flew home yesterday and it contained all of my beauty supplies. Although pretty upset, I am able to gain perspective knowing that it is not the end of the world. That being said, I do not think there is anything wrong with me wearing makeup. I like dressing up, and I think it makes me feel more confident. I am insecure about acne flare-ups, and I prefer to have them covered. Wearing makeup feels comfortable to me. 

A few weeks ago, I attended the Sally G. McMillen Lecture that featured artist, public scholar and theorist of the body Caleb Luna and their talk: “Filth Are My Politics: Toward an Anti-Racist Fat Queer Politic.” I was immediately struck by the way Luna (virtually) initially made the mood of the talk very welcoming and low-key, something most guest lecturers do not ever do. The fact that they were presenting virtually because they were very busy finishing their dissertation also allowed me to relate to Luna in the sense that we were both students who were busy with work. In terms of the content of the talk, Luna offered a fascinating history of fatness and fat phobia as they relate to race, which is an analysis I was completely new to. In their (paraphrased) words, fat phobia has little to do with health and more so with white supremacy’s goal of crafting a legitimate sex, race and class. To expand on this point, Luna spoke about the legacy of Saartje Baartman, in terms of how her body was commodified and put on display for the financial benefit and entertainment of white Europeans, and how it contributed to the creation of racialized genders and a conflation of fatness with conceptions of “racial Others.” Additionally, Luna spoke about art in the Baroque Period (17^th & 18^th centuries) and how it enshrined fat women, which some read as an acceptance of fatness back then. However, Luna problematizes this reading of the art and contends that the reason this depiction of fatness was acceptable was because the women were white. In the development of the “science” behind today’s normative conceptions of fatness, Luna claims there was also an underlining thread of anti-Blackness. After all, the European colonialists in Africa were exploiting and exporting the bodies and skeletons of Black Africans for “scientific” purposes during the 19^th and 20^th centuries. Some of these skeletons are still kept and featured at well-known European museums. This intersectional analysis provided by Luna illuminated a history I was almost completely unaware of prior to the talk. While I knew the story of Saartje Baartman, I did not know about how her story plays into the racialized history of fat phobia.

Throughout the talk Luna recommended the scholarship of numerous authors to explore this topic further such as:

• “Punks, Bulldaggers, and Welfare Queens” by Dr. Cathy J. Cohen
• “Fearing the Black Body: The Racial Origins of Fat Phobia” by Sabrina Strings
• “Spaces between Us: Queer Settler Colonialism and Indigenous Decolonization” by Scott Lauria Morgensen

About two to three weeks ago, I actually partook in the no-product day challenge. Rather than purposefully participating in this activity, this actually started for a few days coincidentally. However, after realizing I did not really need to use my deodorant, I decided to carry on with it to make it roughly a week. Because I identify as a man, the only product I use for body hygiene is my deodorant.Obviously, I wear deodorant so then I would not smell like body odor when around others.

As mentioned earlier, I used no product for about six to seven days, and I was rather surprised by myself. One thing that surprised me was how un-smelly I was with my deodorant. Furthermore, I realized that my deodorant would cause me to smell like body odor more frequently than whenever I did not use it. I also think that swimming helped me cleanse my body odor from the chlorine water that would rinse my body. Even though I use aluminum-free deodorant, its effectiveness of blocking the body odor smell is next to nothing, and makes my armpits sweat more as a result of applying the product.

For quite some time, I have noticed that I have had a body odor problem. After doing this challenge, I realized that the problem was not my natural process, but rather what I do to my body. Applying deodorant temporarily fixed the problem, but would worsen it long term. This challenge made me realize that it is best for your body to do its natural process. The functions of the human body should not be seen as “disgusting” or “uncivilized” – rather, we should all accept what our body does naturally and be proud of it. Products like deodorant are not designed to solve a problem with our bodies, but rather create one when we rely on them.

In early March I attended a talk given by Dr. Ewington at Nummit about queer rights in Ukraine with respect to the ongoing war in Russia. I knew arriving at this event that I would gain a certain amount of insight about the LGBGTQ community in Ukraine (considering that I knew absolutely nothing about the topic prior to this talk), but I certainly did not foresee the level of introspection that would occur as a result of the information that I learned- as details from the talk ended up relating much more to concepts in my own personal life than what I initially expected. This introspection stemmed from 2 ideas that Dr. Ewington introduced in the talk that surprised me both by their content, and the fact that I had never considered them before.

The first of these concepts was the idea that the Soviet Union wasn’t necessarily all bad in the eyes of Ukranians. Initially, I was shocked by this statement, which Dr. Ewington mentioned quite casually in the process of making a separate point entirely. Her wording was something along the lines of “but as we know, a lot of Ukranians were upset by the fall of the Soviet Union…” It was an anecdote, a minor point by comparison of everything that she covered in this talk, but it was the detail that shocked me the most because it revealed my heavily biased understanding of the USSR. Ironically, I had considered myself to be decently knowledgeable about World War I & II and the Cold War, because my family’s move from Alabama to South Carolina in the summer between sixth and seventh grade meant that I learned about these subjects for 2 years in a row, since the state curriculums did not line up evenly. Despite my later understanding that American school systems generally teach through a biased, nationalistic lens (falsely disguised as American “patriotism”) specifically meant to reinforce the idea that the United States has always been the universal “hero” and the countries we have gone to war against are the natural “villains,” I realized from this talk about Ukraine that I never actually applied this context to my understanding of foreign governments during World War I, World War II, and the Cold War.

When Dr. Ewington made this comment, I asked her to clarify, admitting that I had always thought that the USSR was a totalitarianistic government that allowed its citizens less freedoms than they gained in the years following, rather than more. She then explained that although it was heavily controlling, it did allow for significantly more individual thought & freedom than what Putin currently allows for in Russia and intends to allow in Ukraine. Therefore, members of the LGBTQ community did in fact have more rights under the reign of the USSR than they will have if Putin gains complete control over Ukraine. She then elaborated on Putin’s rise to power in Russia, which brings me to my second point of the image that this Russian dictator intends to display to the world.

Dr. Ewington put words to a concept that I previously did not fully understand, which is why so many Republican men of the “good ole boy” type seem to have an infatuation with Russia and Vladmir Putin. She explained that they look to Russia as the picture of masculinity, which inadvertently provided some clarity on a topic I had wondered about years ago regarding a high school relationship; why an ex-boyfriend of mine had been so weirdly obsessed with content related to Putin, out of any political figure for him to idolize as a history major with a substantial following on Reddit. (For context, in retrospect this ex-boyfriend did fit within a certain stereotype of conservative men that would be conceivably more likely to feel empowered by Putin’s representation of masculinity, as a student at a southern military college with a love for World War I weaponry who also happened to have a bit of a Napoleon complex concerning his stature.)

During this part of the talk, Dr. Ewington explained that the pattern of masculine, aggressive, autocratic Russian leaders goes far back in Russian history, and that Putin’s intent to embrace this was likely a reaction the idea of “a loss of manhood” across the world, created by more progressive ideologies in the western world and a movement away from the idea that men must always be the leaders of the household. Putin has gone to great lengths to appoint himself as the representation of this problematic understanding of masculinity, with images of him hunting, riding horses shirtless, and performing various athletic feats circulating the internet- which is almost amusing (if it weren’t for the horrifyingly unethical nature of the vast majority of his actions as president), considering that none of these extracurriculars are remotely relevant to one’s ability to competently rule over a country. Dr. Ewington pointed out that this image of himself that he intends to create is one of indisputable power and authority earned through physical strength and athletic prowess, not unlike the ways in which Americans valued and respected the white cismale soldiers who fought in the world wars and returned to their wives and children able to claim victory for the United States. Ultimately, Putin, like Trump, has sought to become a figurehead for the white cismen who feel emasculated by recent steps towards gender and racial equality, so that he may remind them of their right to claim authority over all, simply because they are men. This is especially exemplified by his “I will take what I want” mentality, as we see from his extreme efforts to maintain his position of power in Russia far past the conclusion of his intended term as president, and more obviously, his effort to take over Ukraine. Essentially Putin’s sudden intensified interest in claiming “rightful” ownership over Ukraine (with his reasoning being that Russia once had control over it during the reign of the USSR) is a quite literal manifestation of the misplaced nostalgia that many conservative men feel today, and their panicked grasping for social relevance and implied dominance in a time when other voices are finally starting to be heard.

I loved this talk a lot! It was presented by Dr. Matrika Johnson, a 2002 Davidson alum, who now owns and runs her own fertility clinic. Instead of simply talking about the care she provides for her transgender patients, she structured this event more like a discussion where she would give us case studies and have us consider possible treatment options. Before we continued on with treatments, she gave us the definitions of top surgery, IVF, IUI, and reciprocal IVF. Initially, I had never heard of top surgery in this implication; I knew that the general idea was to have the physical body match more of what the gender typically looks like (e.g. transgender male removing breast tissue to look more like a “real man”). However, I never considered the fact that if both partners were to go onto hormones and/or become pregnant, any remaining breast tissue could be stimulated and grow. This seems like such a conflicting decision because, with top surgery, this individual took great lengths to have their outer appearance match how they truly feel and the fact that could be reversed would be nerve-racking. Pregnancy is already a mental toll due to the physical changes one undergoes; but, the addition of having a significant gender-related body part change as well can be a difficult decision.

Regardless, I greatly appreciated Dr. Johnson’s approach to this fertility care. She seems to not only value the patients themselves (such as through open insurance conversations), but also the status of their fertility. What I mean by insurance conversations is, in some cases, Dr. Johnson has to refer to her patients by their birth sex on paperwork despite their transition. For instance, if a transgender male received a mammogram, he’s charted as a female because no insurance codes exist for a male getting checked for breast cancer. While not being Dr. Johnson’s fault, this is definitely something that insurance companies need to become more understanding about in the future for all their transgender clients. 

The only aspect of this presentation that I questioned the most was the recommendation for all transgender females to store their sperm before making the transition. Essentially, after taking estrogen for a long time, the production of sperm stops and thus any future genetic reproduction abilities. While this recommendation is good in theory, my issue with it is the fact that, if you’re transitioning from male to female, the last thing that’d be on my mind would be to save some of my sperm– the very identifier I’d want to leave behind of the male sex. And, especially since transitioning is occurring around younger age groups, reproductive options may not even be thought about. Unless further counseling concerning this option is done, this recommendation may seem a little insensitive to the struggles a transgender female had to go through.

This event was quite nuanced to the readings we have done for class. I feel as though much of the papers and media we have absorbed was through the lens of America and seeing the differences with Germany was interesting. However, the closest assignment we’ve done to this talk was definitely The Half of It. Ellie, the only Chinese girl in her town, was visually and culturally isolated from many of her peers. John Amoateng-Kantara was similarly isolated: he noted how any time he walked down the street, he would be stared at. Ironically, John felt most German in the German navy– despite being the only black person on board, the routine and uniforms helped him fit in. Ellie also starts to fit in later on in the movie when she befriends Paul– they met regularly, biked/ran to school together, and even Ellie’s father adjusted to Paul being around. But the two stories do differ. John’s question of “Who am I?” centered primarily around race– the conflict between feeling German (a majority white nationality) and black (a concept he felt tied to mainly from what he saw in American media) left him confused for much of his youth. Ellie, on the other hand, knew who she was, but was more so hidden and less open about her sexuality. Thankfully, at least for John, change did come for Germany and he finds comfort in more black people within the country. The existence of more marginal groups is reflected in a different media piece we’ve covered in this course: Disclosure. Sandra Caldwell emphasizes throughout much of the documentary that she enjoys the presence of more transgender individuals in Hollywood. In a place where she previously was not comfortable with ‘disclosing’ her gender history, she became more open to the idea after she realized how many others like her were around. People like Laverne Cox and more make being transgender in Hollywood less scary than it was before as John finds being black in Germany less isolating.

Despite this talk’s focus on the film industry, which I understood little of, I did learn something else regarding immigration. During this talk, the subject of inappropriate words did come up; more specifically, the use of the R-word was touched upon. And, basically, it made me realize how, if you’re not up-to-date on American terminology, words that were once okay to say may become taboo. As a result, this reminded me of the brief mention in class over the value of “transsexuals” and how, for many younger generations, it can be seen as a slur. But, to someone not familiar with the rapidly changing environment in America, they may not be aware of the cultural change against some words, and taking the time to inform them of the change may be helpful.

I attended Chelsea Manning’s talk on Monday night, and what stood out to me most throughout the entire event was her incredible resilience. Manning explained that at one point she was in solitary confinement for almost a year straight. I could not comprehend how she could have psychologically survived that experience, since isolation, even for a short period of time, is one of the worst kinds of torture. Not only did she survive this experience, along with other extremely difficult experiences such as homelessness, but she seems to have found a community and hobbies that bring her real joy and support. I do not think this should be taken as a feel-good story, since no human being should have to experience what she went through, but it did make me realize how incredibly strong she must be to create a meaningful life for herself after all that has happened.

Chelsea Manning’s description of life in prison forced me to question many of the stereotypes that are enforced in media. She spoke of a real community in prison, with inmates who would look out for each other and even break rules to give each other supplies they needed. She also said the most dangerous and violent people in prisons were always the people working there. While it did not surprise me that the people working in prisons abused their power, I had always assumed there would be lots of danger and violence coming from fellow inmates as well. I got this idea from TV shows like Orange Is the New Black. This stereotype probably makes it more difficult for formerly incarcerated people to find jobs and does not reflect the experience Manning spoke about. Manning even mentioned that she did not have a bad experience being transgender in prison and that many of the other inmates were just happy that she and her lawyers had “gotten one over” on the prison system by getting her access to hormones.

I was deeply moved by Chelsea Manning’s talk. The criminal justice system and prison abolition are issues I hope to be able to learn more about through an intersectional lens with Gender and Sexuality Studies.