Sunday, November 20

I woke up and immediately headed to the gym. I had noticed that I had gained a bit of weight over the summer, so when I came back to Davidson in the fall, I created a strict exercise routine. I exercise for my health, but my mind can’t help but think about the possibility of losing weight as a positive side effect. I exercised for longer and more intensely than usual today I think subconsciously because I’m going to see my parents on Tuesday for Thanksgiving break. For some backstory, I grew up not exercising quite as regularly as the rest of my family, so my parents would warn me about gaining weight. I think I subconsciously want my parents to notice that I’ve been exercising and am keeping weight off.

Tuesday, November 22

I arrived in Asheville right before dinnertime, so we headed to a nice restaurant. I hadn’t eaten much beforehand, so I was really hungry and cleaned my plate. Growing up I was always told that I ate “like a bird,” so my mother commented that she’d never seen me eat that much. I sheepishly answered that I had been hungry, thinking to myself that maybe I should have slowed down a bit.

Thursday, November 24

After cooking all morning, we enjoyed a lovely and delicious Thanksgiving meal for lunch. My mom asked me what my favorite Thanksgiving dish was growing up, and I answered that dressing (which I’ve been told some people call stuffing?) has always been my favorite as I stood up to get a second serving. “I love it too, but it’s way too carb-y,” she replied as she looked down and patted her thighs. “We need to go work out to burn all this off!” I didn’t get as much for my second serving.

Friday, November 25

I had been talking with my mother about my exercise habits, so the morning after Thanksgiving we got up and went to the gym together. As I lifted weights, wearing leggings and only a sports bra, my mom admired my form. “You look great,” she said. “You’re so skinny!” I felt some pride that she noticed, but knew it wasn’t an accurate reflection of my health—my diet and sleep schedule for the previous few weeks had been exceptionally poor.